Friday, April 15, 2016

Porn Star Does Her Taxes, Seeks Deductions On Seductions

As the tax filing deadline approaches, porn star Jayden Jaymes meets with accountant Brendan Jones to discuss deductions unique to her profession.

While some of her questions are scripted, video maker Elite Daily tells us, Jones' advice is real.

It might be awkward for a tax man to deal with queries such as "Can I write off lubricant?" But given that Jones' Twitter account says he is also a comedian, he can probably handle it.

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Judge Rules Katy Perry Can Buy Historic Former Los Angeles Convent

Pop star Katy Perry will get her chance to live in a former Roman Catholic convent after a judge on Wednesday invalidated the property's sale by five nuns to a restaurateur.

The case had pitted Perry, daughter of Protestant pastors and one of the top-selling pop stars in the world, and the archdiocese against the Sisters of the Immaculate Heart of Mary.

The nuns, all aged between late 70s and late 80s, once lived in the convent and two of them wanted to sell it to Los Angeles restaurateur Dana Hollister.

The archdiocese filed a lawsuit last June, arguing that the two nuns did not have the authority to sell the property to Hollister.

Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Stephanie Bowick approved the archdiocese's motion to block the sale to Hollister, voiding the purchase documents and deed. She said the nuns did not have the authority to sell the property and that even if they had, they did not properly validate the transaction.

Representatives for Hollister did not reply to requests for comment.

The archdiocese said it was "gratified" by Bowick's ruling in a statement, and added that it was still under contract to sell the convent to Perry.

"The Archdiocese was forced to take legal action to protect all the five sisters from being taken advantage of by the Dana Hollister transaction," it said, adding that it will continue to provide care for the nuns.

Perry, who rose to fame with the hit song "I Kissed a Girl," offered to buy the 8-acre (3-hectare) Roman Villa-style property for $14.5 million.

The nuns had rebuffed the 31-year-old performer, accepting a competing $15.5 million bid from Hollister, who wanted to convert the former convent into a hotel.

Attorney John Scholnick, who represents two of the five nuns, told Reuters he was "disappointed," but emphasized that the ruling only invalidated the sale to Hollister and did not authorize the sale to Perry. He said there could be an option for an appeal.

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Joe Alterman Packs Birdland's Weird and Wonderful Early Bird Special

Manhattan's Birdland, the Mother of All Jazz Clubs, has a new way of getting paying customers' asses into seats at 6 pm a few evenings a week. Just don't expect Ron Carter, Sonny Rollin, Herbie Hancock or Diane Krall to be performing. Instead, the Birdland Early Bird (Music) Specials allow gifted young musicians to add a gig at the world's landmark jazz club to their résumés. And if the fans of the partially knowns only partially fill the tables, it keeps the cash registers clinking more lucratively then if the room were filled with the sounds of silence, either melodic and monetary.

Last Thursday evening at 5:45 pm. Birdland was packed to the nines for 27-year-old Joe Alterman's Birdland debut, a significant event for him. Ten years ago when Joe was a senior in high school, his dad and he flew to Manhattan from Atlanta to catch what turned out to be the legendary Oscar Peterson's final New York appearance. Joe has never forgotten Peterson's powerful presence and dreamed about performing at Birdland ever since. Now, two CD's and several jazz festival appearances later, that dream was coming true and his father (and mother) sat facing him, pleased as punch at their son's success.

Alterman is hardly a keyboard Joey-come-lately. He's been tickling the ivories since he was five -- following his brothers to bluegrass festivals until his father plied him with bluesy jazz records that were a better fit. I first heard him at Dizzy's Club three years ago when he was enrolled in NYU's graduate music program and I've been an Alterman groupie ever since. My fellow fans include jazz authority Nat Hentoff who believes Joe "represents the past, present and future of jazz," and that "he'd be able to hold his own even with greats like Parker, Gillespie, Monk and Davis." Moreover, an actual Beatle was impressed enough with Joe's playing at a Friar's Club brunch to walk over to Joe's upright and ask Joe where he'd learned the tunes he was playing because they reminded Paul McCartney of his father.

Joe is handsome guy, with enough dark hair to pass as a Kennedy. He appeals to the square, the chic and the trendy. In a nicely fitting dark suit, white shirt and greenish-blue silk tie, he looks like a hip, happy accountant, or would if such a beast existed. Joe's an exuberant performer, beating the rhythm of the song he's playing with the foot not pressing the piano pedals, shaking his shoulders while boogying up and down the piano bench. He's polite too, and listens respectfully as bass player Nathaniel Schroeder and drummer Doug Hirlinger's play solo.

Alterman's attracted significant musical mentors including Les McCann, with whom he co-wrote "The Theme," a lush, sensuous, romantic melody, and sassy, senior saxophone bluesman, Houston Person, who plays that tune so seductively that it makes you want to snuggle forever, but only with someone you love. Alterman's set opened with "Give Me the Simple Life," followed by "I Heard it on the Grapevine" and "Time After Time." He pays homage to Les McCann with "The Theme," to Oscar Peterson with "Kelly's Blues," moves forward in time with Carole King's, "Take Good Care of My Baby," and shifts backwards with an angular arrangement of "Blue Moon." His strong but gentle fingers dance over the keys and his heart and brain speak to the strings in the piano harp. The Amazing Kreskin, seated beside me, found Joe's artistry truly amazing.

Other impressive talents I've heard at Birdland at 6 pm include Pianist Matt Baker, Blues Singer Carole J. Bufford, Vocalist Marissa Mulder and the bluesy Rob Silverman Quartet. The cover charge sounds steep at 25 bucks, but if you Google "complementary and discounted Broadway and Off Broadway tickets," several organizations that offer members the same performance for considerably less cash will pop up right before your very eyes. Furthermore, Birdland's food and drink minimum is a bargain $10 and their food is fresh, filling and tasty. The early show at Birdland is well worth paying to see.

To check out future gigs at Birdland go to To see what Alterman is up to check his calendar at

Birdland 212-581-3080
315 W. 44th St.
New York, NY 10036

Photo Credit: Fran Kaufman

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